Practical Psychology for Lovers: An Introduction

Needing to understand each other becomes most pressing when we are in love.

(Photo by Birmingham Museums Trust on Unsplash)

By Dr T J Jordan

We feel the most intense need to know what makes someone tick and how best to respond to them when we begin to love them. Suddenly, we feel the need for psychological insights because we want to love our best and to best meet the needs of our partners while attending to our own mental wellness.

Nobody who is in love actually wants to find ways to love more poorly!

Whether we have had many experiences with relationships or are starting new, we all have psychological baggage. Our attachment styles begin to get established during earliest infancy. During each stage of our development, we meet social, emotional, and physical milestones. The manner in which we contend with these milestones makes us who we become in relationships.

From early school crushes through adolescent urges and emerging adulthood attempts at intimacy, we each develop unique ways of seeking, and sometimes finding, love. To love greatly we need to love with our authentic selves and to be loved for all that we bring into our relationships. Anything less guarantees less than gratifying partnerships and failed intimacy.