Next Stop Ecstasy*
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Six steps for getting your relationship from here to there
By Dr T J Jordan
Sometimes we long to make sex more than the brushing of bodies. We yearn to touch the divine in each other. Sometimes we need to feel that we’re meeting each other’s souls. But getting there is another story.
Nobody taught us how to do this most important task of our lives. We learned many things along the way, but we have received poor foundations in the mysterious art of loving. We wind up with lots of facts but very little practical wisdom.
To change our love lives from mundane conformity to adventurous intimacy, we need to be bold explorers, even renegades. We need to buck social conventions and the expectations of our tribes. We need to be Christopher Columbus, Albert Einstein, Amelia Earhart — and sometimes Mother Teresa.
We need to be agents of change in societies that privilege the superficial, the material, and the status quo. We need to be willing to risk just about everything we thought we knew about sex and love.
The mantle of our prior experiences must grow anachronistic and drop away. We are experiencing love in ways that defy our old expectations — and we need to take different pathways forward. We need to become discoverers of brave new worlds.
Steps Along the Way
Wisdom is difficult — but we can support the growth of our wisdom and begin following our bliss by developing these habits:
— 1. Challenge your social constructions of love, sex, and coupledom.
The world is undergoing a revolution in loving, but this revolution will be seen best in retrospect. Some of us are pioneers in this movement. By enhancing our loving, we are helping ourselves as well as helping others to see what is possible. We are demonstrating how to live in the farther reaches of intimate love.
These farther reaches are marked by a paradigm shift. Sometimes we give a lot more…
