How Body Image Impacts Our Sex Lives

Dr T J Jordan
4 min readAug 4, 2022

Our bodies are not usually barriers to magnificent sex — but our ideas about our bodies can kill our sexuality.

Photo by Anita Jankovic on Unsplash

By Dr T J Jordan

How we think about our bodies impacts our sexual confidence as well as our sexual enjoyment. How we feel about our bodies impacts our sex-life satisfaction, our desires for sex, and our passion.

Body image is not limited to a mental representation of our physical form. It is a complex package of ideas and emotions. It is filled with evaluations, many of them negative. Body image would fade into unimportance if there were no emotional, value-laden components.

While more females than males report worrying about body image, all genders and orientations are vulnerable. Media ensure that we all are reminded constantly of our physical imperfections.

We blame our bodies for past rejections, often believing that we must engage in radical self-improvement efforts to change our physical selves in order to obtain sexual love. When we can't find what we yearn for, we blame our bodies. And because failure hurts, we persuade ourselves to hide from sexuality.

When we reveal ourselves to our lovers, we tend to be inhibited by what we perceive as our flaws. We try to hide our imperfections — and when we try to hide some part of our physical bodies, we can't help but hide our emotional selves as well. And hiding makes intimacy impossible.

Even in long-term relationships, feelings of unworthiness and discomfort kill sexuality. When we tell ourselves that we aren't good enough to have great sex, we stop seeking intimate pleasure and begin sliding into non-sexual lives.

The appearance of our bodies might not matter as much as…

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Dr T J Jordan

Passionate about sexualities, masculinities, relationships, intimacy, mental health, CPTSD , animals, growth, psychology, and exotic locations.