What it is and how to enhance it By Dr T J Jordan Our tolerance for physical pain has been well studied — but our tolerance for emotional pain is poorly understood. In fact it’s called “distress” tolerance — which seems to imply that it’s something less than pain. Our…

Enlisting our minds, our hearts, and our souls along with our bodies… By Dr T J Jordan In conversation with Dr Yasmin E Emory Our skin is our largest sense organ, covering about 18 square feet on the average adult. Our brain is our most powerful sex organ, capable of…

We all have relationship wounds. It’s what we do with them that matters. By Dr T J Jordan All of us have wound lists, whether we’re aware of them or not. We don’t get very far in life without incurring relational wounds. And when we love, we automatically put ourselves…

These compelling feelings are not just for the narcissists among us… By Dr T J Jordan We savor our grudges. We collect resentments. We wallow in our urges for vengeance. And the less confident we feel about ourselves, the more we practice these rituals. Sometimes we go to such extremes…

The Fourth of July took on new meaning for me… By Dr T J Jordan There were weeks when I thought we would never get home. And then there was the glorious moment when our plane hovered above a New York airport, poised to touch down on American soil. I…

Because little traumas can add up to big Trauma — and the little t’s are common in adult relationships By Dr T J Jordan We have been late to the party when it comes to understanding trauma. We have known about the psychological effects of devastating events at least since…

How to use the past to revive passion and to recover from wounded self worth By Dr T J Jordan We all have relationship stories, ranging from a desert of painfully unrequited love to a multifaceted history of exhilarating romantic adventures. We all have stories of temptations denied and temptations…

Here are the instructions… By Dr T J Jordan Relationship anarchy is a style of connecting with romantic partners that rejects the demands of traditional norms. It privileges the creation of “customized” agreements between partners. It helps us to examine and redefine the ways we merge. The practice of relationship…

Neglect exerts a supremely powerful, destructive force on our relationships. By Dr T J Jordan We inflict such suffering when we neglect! Yet, neglect is surprisingly common in our adult relationships. Neglect translates into deprivation. Neglect means that something our bodies, minds, hearts, or souls needs from our partners is…